Jon Snow: Loyal lords of House Stark. As you know, our motto has always been ‘Winter is coming.’ But now, Winter is here. Which leaves us with a branding problem.
SFX: Mutters from crowd.
Voice 1: But that’s been our tagline for ten thousand years! It has incredible cut-through in all the key demographics!
Jon Snow: Valyrian steel cut-through cannot stop us becoming dated.
Voice 2: We can’t change! It’s on our shields!
Voice 1: And the banners. Seven hells, think of the stitching!
Voice 3: How about we say ‘Winter is..’ and then just trail off.
Voice 2: What if we just said “we told you so”?
Voice 1 “Or….winter is both coming and here!”
Voice 3: That’s clunky
SFX: Disapproving Rabble.
SFX: Fist slams into table
Jon Snow: Wait… I think I’ve got it. Winter is… cold?”
AWKWARD SILENCE
SFX: Cough
Voice 2: I think we need a brainstorm. Sir.
SFX: Game Of Thrones theme sting
VO: Winter is finally here. Game of Thrones. Season 7. Streaming now on NEON, at neontv.co.nz