SFX: AMBIANCE, RESTAURANT

MVO1: Hey chief...?

MVO2: Huh?

MVO1: Uhh...about how many girls have you gone out with?

MVO2: The number of girls I’ve dated?

MVO1: Yeah.

MVO2: Ha ha... Give me a second. If I go back to the very first one, I can count them up.

MVO1: What? That many?

MVO2: Well, what can I say...

MVO1: Wow!

MVO2: Well, the first was...my second year in high school.

MVO1: Yeah!

MVO2: I liked a girl for a long time, and when I told her she gave me the OK!

MVO1: Cool!

MVO2: But after school that day she said it'd never work.

MVO1: Huh...?

MVO2: Breaking up was really tough.

MVO1: Uh...uh...I, um...that, uh...it's...

MVO2: Hm?

MVO1: I don't think that counts as someone you went out with.

MVO2: Why not? Can't include her?

MVO1: I don't think she really counts.

MVO2: That's pretty strict.

MVO1: Sorry.

MVO2: So then...about the second one.

MVO1: Ah, no, it's still the first one...

MVO2: The first one?

MVO1: Yeah...

MVO2: I guess we really didn't go out...

MVO1: Uh, no...

MVO2: Well, there was that one long-distance relationship...

MVO1: Yeah...?

MVO2: Her phone number...what prefecture was she again...

MVO1: Hm, what?

MVO2: You know, 0120.

MVO1: That's a toll-free number. Hey look, that doesn't count either.

MVO2: I once did a duet with a girl from the office.

MVO1: Uh-uh. Nope.

MVO2: My fortune cookie said I'd meet someone...

MVO1: No!

MVO2: I ate a radish shaped like a woman...

MVO1: Uh-uh.

MVO2: A mysterious beautiful woman appeared to me in bed...

MVO1: No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

MVO2: I was attacked by a female gorilla...

MVO1: Chief, the girls you've dated is — zero!

SFX: BEER OPENED, POURED

ANNCR: Zero alcohol, zero calories, zero sugar. Three zeros — Suntory All-Free beer.

SE: Jun kissa.

MAN 1: Senpai ?

MAN 2: Oo ?

MAN 1: Ano...Imamade ni tsukiatta hito te nanin gurai irun suka?

MAN 2: Tsukiatta ninzu ?

MAN 1: Hai.

MAN 2: Ah... Chotto matteya. Saisyo kara kazoenagara omoidasukara.

MAN 1: E Sonnani irunsuka ?

MAN 2: Mana...

MAN 1: E Sugoisune !

MAN 2: Hajimete tsukiotan ha… Koni yattakana.

MAN 1: A hai !

MAN 2: Zutto suki yatta ko ni kokuhaku shitara OK moroteyana.

MAN 1: He..!

MAN 2: Ma sonohi no hokago ni yappari muri te iwareten kedona.

MAN 1: E...

MAN 2: Wakareru no tsurakatta wa.

MAN 1: A...A...Iya...Ano, Sore ha...

MAN 2: Nn a ?

MAN 1: Tabun…Tsukiatta ninzu ni…Hairanai njya naisuka?

MAN 2: Nandeyanen ! ... Hairahennoka ?

MAN 1: Hairanaito…omounsukedo.

MAN 2: Shibia yana.

MAN 1: A Suimasen.

MAN 2: N na are…Hutarime nanyakedo yana.

MAN 1: A, iya, Ano, Hitorimeha ...?

MAN 2: Hitorime ?

MAN 1: A ... Hai …

MAN 2: Areka Tsukiatte henka ...

MAN 1: A, Hai... Sossune.

MAN 2: Hona areya, Honmano hitorime wa chokyorirenai yakedona...

MAN 1: Hai...

MAN 2: Ano denwa bango doko no ken no ko nanyaro...

MAN 1: E, hai ?

MAN 2: Omae shitteruka? 0120.

MAN 1: Furidaiaru sune… E, Teiuka soremo hairanaisukedo.

MAN 2: Hona jyoshi syain to dyuetto sita...

MAN 1: Hairanaisu.

MAN 2: Omikuji ni machibito kitaru te kaiteta...

MAN 1: Hairanaisu.

MAN 2: Onna no katachi sita daikon kuta koto ande...

MAN 1: Hairanaisu.

MAN 2: Nazo no bijyo ga makuramoto ni arawareru...

MAN 1: Hairanaisu.

MAN 2: Mesu gorira ni osowareta koto ga...

MAN 1: Senpai, tsukiatta ninzu zero desune…

SE: Bushu! Shuwaaaa!

NARRATOR: Arukoru zero karori zero toushitu zeto.
Mittu no zero no Suntory All Free.