SFX: Busy airport terminal We hear items being placed into a plastic tray.
VO: You’re at airport security. After successfully fitting your wallet, cellphone, laptop, belt, shoes and all your dental fillings into a plastic tray smaller than a 5-year-old’s lunch box, you reluctantly fold your MJ Bale suit jacket on top of the quivering pile.
SFX: Footsteps
VO: Feeling like a freshly plucked chicken, you make your way through the metal detector.
SFX: Beeping of metal detector
VO: With his plastic wand, the security guard then feverishly glides down your suit pants as if searching for treasure on a clearly private beach.
SFX: Buzzing of hand held detector
VO: Not satisfied, it’s off to the full body scanner. Here the chicken theme continues as you assume the spatchcock position while x-rays violate you in ways humans could only dream of.
SFX: Sound of laser circling body.
VO: As you finally retrieve your belongings and frantically reassemble yourself, you take some comfort in knowing that while you may take a while to recover from this airport ordeal, the MJ Bale suit you’re wearing, won’t. It’s superior crimp ensuring it springs back to form quickly. Just in time for your cavity search.