THIS IS THE ENGLISH TRANSCRIPT OF A LIVE RADIO CALL-IN, NOT A REGULAR SPOT! THIS WAS DONE IN COLLABORATION WITH THE FM CHANNEL AND IS A RECORDING FROM THE LIVE PROGRAM.
RJ: And our next caller is Radhe Jha from Darbhanga. He’s been calling us since morning…Tell us Radhe, what’s your story?
Caller: Like I was saying, my friend Tiwari met me under the bridge that day. He tells he is in love with seductive lady from the medical college.
RJ: What are you saying?!
Caller: But he say that there’s one small tension, he just can’t make propose to her and wants me to go with him so that he doesn’t make any silly mistakes.
RJ: That’s a good plan!
Caller: I first resist and say, why my friend are you corrupting a clean bachelor like me huh? But when he say that the seductress has a sweet friend also, then I find it very hard to control my emotion.
RJ: Can’t blame you!
Caller: So I kickstart my Rajdoot bike and we race to the girls hostel. In between, Tiwari says stop, stop, let’s buy some scented floral oil to make good impression with ladies.
Now I had stolen 50 Rupees from my father’s shirt pocket, out of which I bought the floral scented oil for 45 Rupees. I tell you, I have been around, but this scented oil was just too good, what fragrance! Swear by the holy Ganga, it felt like French Enchanteur!
RJ: Then what happened?
Caller: I’m telling, why are you interrupting? Disturbance not!
RJ: Ok sorry.
Caller: So, we get to the hostel, I park my bike. Then we go behind a tree nearby and take out the floral scented oil and eagerly pour a large quantity on my head. What aroma, what fragrance!
But suddenly, I look over my head and see what?
RJ: What?
Caller: I see a bee, a bloody honeybee. It is thinking my head is a bouquet of flowers!
I try to shoo it away and see what?
RJ: What?
Caller: What what?!! That bloody bee is not alone! There was a whole army of bees above my head! So what to do? I start running very fast. I ran and ran till my lungs were sounding like a duotone harmonium!
Finally I stopped running and look back, there were no bees. Right in front, I see Pandey’s shop. It had a banner that said Nimbooz now for Rupees 5. Thank god I say, I had only 5 Rupees left! I quickly gulped down the Nimbooz and that completely refreshed me.
That day I learnt two lessons: First lesson, Now Nimbooz 200 ml glass bottle is only Rupees 5 for a month, including all taxes!
RJ: And the second one?
Caller: Which second one? I only said one. Why are you confusing me all the time?!! (Phone disconnects)
RJ: Hullo, hullo….seems like he’s gone!
Script In Orginal Langauge
THIS IS THE TRANSCRIPT OF A LIVE RADIO CALL-IN, NOT A REGULAR SPOT! THIS WAS DONE IN COLLABORATION WITH THE FM CHANNEL AND IS A RECORDING FROM THE LIVE PROGRAM:
RJ: Aur humare agle caller hain Radhe Jha Darbangha se!! Yeh subah se call kar rahe hain.. batao Radhe ji kya baat hai..
Radhe Jha: (In a typical Bihari tone) Jaisa ki hum bata rahe the ki.. woh humara dost hai na Tiwari –Tiwari… arrey mila us din pulia ke neeche aur kaha humse ki bhaiya medical college ki ek haseena ko hum dil de baithe hain.
RJ: Ka baat kar rahe ho
Radhe Jha: Aur bola ki dekho ek hi tension hai.. hum abhi tak poora propose nahin kar paye hai, aur hum chahte hain ki aap hamre saath rahen taki koi mishtake ishtake na hone paaye.
RJ: Bilkul ..barobar
Radhe Jha: Hum bola kahe ko brahmchari ko phasaye rahe ho bhaiya.. lekin jab woh bataye ki us haseena ki ek saheli bhi hai.. Toh hum apna emotion ko control nahin kar paye…
RJ: Ho hi nahi sakta
Radhe Jha: Bas kick mare raajdoot ko aur chal pade girl’s hoshtal ki or! Beech mein tiwari bole rook-roko ..aur kewra-chameli ka tel bhi kharidwaye, bola ki impression achcha rahega. Babujee ke kurte se 50 ka note nikaal kar chale they, usme se 45 rupaye ka khareed liya tel. Ab hum bhi thora phoren-woren ghoome hain..arrey Ganga kasam..aisa mahak ki jaisa French enchantor …
RJ: Phir kya hua aage batao
Radhe Jha: arrey wahi toh bata rahe hain..toka-taki kahe kar rahe hain
RJ: Acha sorry!
Radhe Jha: Disturbance not
RJ: Arrey Sorry.
Radhe Jha: Toh hum hostel ke paas pahunche, rajdoot ko lagaya kinare, aur wahin ek pedh ke peeche gaye burshat-wurshat theek kiye….. tel ki sheeshi nikaali aur udel di sar pe. Arrery kya mahak, kya khushboo. Par tabhi dekhte hain kya..ki ek makhi..sasoori makhi humre sar ke upar bhinbhinane lagi. Hum usko hutane ko upar muh kiye toh dekha..kya??
Rj: Kya??
Radhe Jha: Arrey kya?? Kya?? Akeli makkhi nahin sasoora poora ka poora chatta humri or daurr raha tha..bas fir hum kya karte..arrey daudna shuru kiye..arrey hanphte-hanphte phainphada ka harmonium bajne laga..toh laga diya break aur peeche dekha koi makkhi-tataiyaa nahin tha, bas saamne the pandey ki dukaan aur uspar likha tha, Nimbooz ab paanch rupaye mein..ab paanch rapaye kahan the who bhi jeb mein ..bas gatagat karke pee gaye Nimbooz toh jaan mein jaan aa gayi..ahahah…Toh us din humne do sabak seekhe ….ek toh ye, ki ab ek mahiney tak Nimbooz ki 200ml kaanch waali bottle sirf paanch ki hai, tax-wax sab mila ke.
Rj: Aur doosra?
Radhe Jha: arrey kaun sa doosra..hum toh ek hi toh bole they! Confuse kahe kar rahe hain.. (Disconnected tone)